Hands up who's yet to notice that current energetic influences have shone a very bright spotlight upon every type of relationship? Hmm, it's been interesting for the last few weeks, to say the least, so let's consider how some dynamics might play out so that at least some people can sigh with relief knowing that it's not just them who's being put through the mill of emotion and that many others are experiencing similar in their own lives.
Whether short or long term, personal, parent/child, working, friendship or fleeting stranger - all relationships will have been having issues of late. This is no surprise now that we are in a time of great change in so many ways, as relationships are the very vehicle by which any of us can learn about ourselves and the other. Of late, I've noticed several long term relationships flounder, family relationships have struggled with a spanner in the works and newer relationships have had to rapidly lay foundations and boundaries if they are to survive. Even in the work environment, dynamics have been squeezed and sudden change has been the result for some.
As we look around, we would be forgiven for feeling unsettled as the emotional landscape has been changing so quickly. Current planetary influences now highlight the importance of being free to be your true self, no matter what anyone around you thinks, no matter what the 'rules' have been thus far. I'm sure many have felt like throwing caution to the wind as the pressure to break out of restrictive circumstances just became too much to contain, and who could blame them?
One of the ways I try to work out what's going on when relationship problems arise is to consider the various archetypes that make up my persona, and consider which of these might be out of balance and displaying its negative side. To quote from Carl Jung/Caroline Myss, "archetypes are psychological patterns derived from historical roles in life, such as Mother, Child, Trickster, Prostitute, Servant and become personalised when they're part of your own psyche" It is believed that the 12 archetypes we are born with provide the foundation for personality, drives, feelings, beliefs, motivations and actions. For instance -
The Fool - Light attribute: fearlessly revealing emotion, helping people laugh at absurdity and hypocrisy. Shadow attributes: using humour to wound rather than liberate, denial of your emotional truth.
or The Saboteur - Light attribute: highlights your fear of self-empowerment and the changes it would bring to your life. Shadow attribute: induces self-destructive behaviour or the desire to undermine others.
The reason I mention this strategy is that in some people, perhaps those who have invested years of energy into one particular aspect of their lives (study, career, etc) in pursuit of a particular goal, are surprised and puzzled when another aspect of their lives fails to thrive and live up to their hopes, yet it is no wonder when we have several different sides to our nature or many parts to the whole. If we are to progress upon a solid foundation, we need to 'grow' all aspects of our persona and pay attention to any aspects that require time to heal, investing whatever time is necessary. The negative aspects usually show as behavioural traits that are out of character so listen to the words others use about us as they reflect back what they see, for at such times, it's difficult to be subjective.
Personal growth is offered on the plate of relationship many times during our lifetime - sometimes the portion is manageable and we willingly accept with some personal insight ensuing; sometimes it seems huge and we turn away from the challenge and its subsequent growth potential to follow a familiar path, only to have the same trial return at a later date but this time bigger. Having the humility to accept the challenges of life that relationships bring and to keep checking in with ourselves about what is important to us as individuals takes persistence. The return on this tenacity can lead to a fulfilled life, a feeling that by the end of it, you've done and achieved much and your purpose here has been meaningful.
